Feeleez Emotional Spectrum Chart
Feeleez Emotional Anatomy Chart
Our charts are designed to help you understand your child’s behavior and emotions, and to help you know how to respond in the most neuro-emotionally beneficial way.
Let’s use the chart with Patrick!
Patrick feels mad at the boy who lives down the street. He’s getting so worked up that he starts calling the neighbor kid names like “idiot” and “dumbhead” while he storms around the house.
Patrick’s Grandma feels alarm. She knows the boy down the street struggles and has very few friends. She wants Patrick to be kind and understanding. She grabs her Feeleez Emotional Spectrum chart. She studies it and remembers that Patrick might be lashing out at others in a misguided attempt to feel better.
She starts listening carefully to his complaints and not contradicting him.
Patrick: “He was just making up his own rules as he went along! That’s not how the game works!”
Grandma: “Unh hunh. I can see you did not like that at all!”
Patrick: “He just drives me crazy! He’s such an idiot.”
Grandma: “Wow. You seem really, really angry.”
Patrick: “I am! I just want the game to be fair.”
Grandma: “You sound like you feel very frustrated by how the game was going… Darn it.”
When Patrick gets close enough she places a calm hand on his arm. A few minutes pass and Patrick lets out a long sigh. His body is relaxed now and he leans in for a hug.
Grandma remembers the chart and senses he might have access to his executive brain now.
Grandma: “Do you think that neighbor boy was having a hard time today?”
Patrick nods and his face softens.
Patrick: “I think every day is hard for him Grandma.”
Grandma nods with understanding.
Patrick: “Grandma? I’m going back out to see if he and I can start over.”
Because Patrick got support around his feelings, his neural processing has moved into the executive brain network. From here he can access his natural sense of compassion for others and act on that compassion. The more Grandma helps Patrick process his feelings the more he will be able to move up the emotional spectrum on his own, and act from a place of clear thinking and consideration.
Patrick